Home on the Udairi Range

Strap yourselves in; gonna be a long one.

We left Camp Virginia on Wednesday around 1300 (that's 1pm for all you civilian types) for the Udairi Range. Not a long trip, but we rode the bus in full armor. We arrive around 1430 or so (just add an hour and a half to 1pm) and subsequently ground our gear. Then we picked it up and took it somewhere else. Then we were told to pick it up and bring it inside. About 20 seconds later, we were told to leave it where we were already standing. Anyone but me getting flashbacks?

You'd be proud of me, though. I made the wise choice. Knowing full well the likelihood that whoever was in charge PROBABLY didn't know what to do, I stood my ground. This is where my good time begins! As soon as the aforementioned 'HNIC' (google it and look for it in Urban Dictionary, it's worth it) told us to leave our stuff in the second spot, two people had tantrums and BAM! I literally bathed in happiness as it left their bodies. It was the moment that made the last three days worth every unopposable grain of sand I can't find on my body.

Now I realize that it's not right to relish in someone else's anguish. However, it would just be bad economics to allow that happiness to go free. Okay, enough of that. After the tantrums, we got inside our tent that served as classroom/sleeping area. Had a nice little class about convoy tactics and battle stuff, army, army, army...Sorry Uncle Ron, I know it will save my life, and I promise I listened, but I just wanted to shoot something. We downloaded alot of good combat info and then moved chairs around so the 40 of us could sleep on the floor. I found all the smokers outside on the way to the head. I may have also made some comment about scorpions and their affinity for smoke, etc, etc...I don't remember.

Aside: I realize that this was kinda wrong, too, but you have to understand I spent 2 years on a submarine. My scope of what's entertaining has been, how shall I say, 'illuminated' to the joys of sowing a little discord for my enjoyment. A few months before decom started, I took this one officer's hat and gave it to another officer to wear (he thought it was his own). But I held onto it for a week or so to build his frustration. So it wasn't just the small altercation between them in the middle of Muster that made it worth it, it was the fact that all that work paid off.

Okay, back on point. Went to the range Thursday morning and shot about 60 rounds or so, some while walking. This one girl that was standing next to me kept ending up behind me while we were doin the walk and shoot. It brought to mind the comment the range master made before we got started: "If someone gets shot, don't rush to help them, we have people for that." Huh? This happens so much they have a SOP for it? So the range was exciting in several ways for me.

That night we did another class and the TCs (truck commanders) and Convoy Commander came up with our battle plan and briefed us all that night. All good plans...

Friday morning, 0430, Reveille. No bugels, just plenty of snoring. Not by me, I slept on my stomach to keep from getting gagged at night. We loaded up the trucks and I got some good pictures (I'll post them when I get a chance) before we mounted and headed off to our Start Point. Our first checkpoint was the second traffic circle we came to. The Army hires TCN (third country nationals) to help us practice and there were a bunch of them in this little 'town.' Didn't really matter. We went through that thing so fast, that the suicide 'bomber' we never saw didn't have a chance to get close. Hey! Don't make fun, we're Navy. I buy food, parts and torpedoes for a living :)

After that was some fun stuff but would honestly be boring to read it. We sang alot of Garth in the truck while we were moving and keeping our eyes peeled for 'IED' indications. At one point, a vehicle got hit by one and there was an ambush to go with it. Once again, they employ TCNs to point fake weapons at us for realism. So I'm in the Aid and Litter vehicle...guess what I get to do? I get to run my up-armored tail to the damaged vehicle and fish out the injured/dead people and bring them to another vehicle! Yeah! When we practiced it Thursday night, we did it without body armor and I almost died hauling this 250lb guy about 200ft. Today it was just a 130lb female, so worked out much better for my heart and back. We did pretty well for our second time ever doing it, if you ask me (really, who else would you ask?). Eventually the instructors reset all the dead and injured so we could keep driving and what happens next? The lead vehicle runs right over a tripwire and triggers an IED in a disabled vehicle. Luckily that was the end of our route and we were told to wrap it up.


So that about sums up our last few days. Now I'm sitting at Starbucks, belly full of MREs and Dulce de Leche Frappucinos. We'll find out in about an hour when we'll be leaving. Because they schedule this range thing at the end, I'll be leaving the country with dirty laundry.

...come on, I'm a sailor, I had to wrap it up with a complaint!